Pimps and a Promotion
by Karla ° Friday, November 9, 2007
One thing you must know about Mark and me is that we are notoriously sarcastic. The only difference between the two of us is that he can add satiric flair to his words that is actually funny, whereas I always end up sounding like an ignoramus.

Like the other day for example. I brought Nate to a playgroup and the group that was there before us had decorated and embellished a lawn chair with oversized buttons, unidentifiable paper shapes and flowing streamers. And you know how it goes with toddler crafts; you are not exactly sure what they are supposed to be, but you love them anyway because your kid made it. So although I had no idea what the purpose of the chair was, I do have to admit that it was totally pimped out. All that was missing was some crushed velour and purple neon plates.

I am never very comfortable in social situations with groups of people that I do not know and if I had to guess by the silence in the room, the rest of the moms felt the same way. Looking for a conversation starter, I blurted out, “Wow, that’s some pimped out chair other there, eh?”

Apparently, judging by the blank stares and continued awkward silence, everyone either thought that I was 12, or a complete ass for making reference to a pimp in room full of babies.

Note to self: Must remember to stick to boring topics like the weather and, oh my goodness, can you believe how high the Canadian dollar is?

Mark is much better at the whole being social with people and communicating thing and that is probably why he was recently promoted.

This is all very exciting news for our little family because this means that Samson can now afford more dog cookies.

Mark works in technology at a hospital, so while he has been transitioning into his new role, one of his team members jokingly asked how he’s been enjoying the executive limo service.

All serious like, Mark told him that he had to decline it because when he found out that he was getting a promotion, he went out and bought himself a brand new Escalade which he now parks in the ambulance parking zone.

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That's the problem with play groups. You have no idea what these mothers are like. Yes, you all have children, but aside from that you could have nothing in common. If I was there, I would have laughed out loud at your comment! I mean, really, is a baby going to pick up on the word pimp? I think not.
Posted by Blogger Colleen :  November 09, 2007

Yay for the promotion!

And yup, if I had been there, I totally would have laughed.

I can't find anyone around here with the same kind of snark as me.
Posted by Blogger Gina :  November 09, 2007

Even if some of them thought it was funny, which assuredly they did, they were probably too inhibited to laugh. Oh well! Keep trying!
Posted by Blogger Eva :  November 09, 2007

I would have definitely been laughing right along with you! And yay for more dog cookies!
Posted by Blogger Brandy :  November 09, 2007

LOL I love you guys! and your beautiful dog samson! you guys rock :) thanks for the laugh :)
Posted by Blogger Kathy :  November 10, 2007

I am not very good in social situations either. However, everyone seems to love John. Random people are always striking up conversations with him.
Posted by Blogger Christy :  November 10, 2007

I have the same problem. That's why I don't attend playgroups and mom's groups anymore. I wish you lived here, WE would get each other! I would find you endlessly hilarious...and, well, you would probably give me the blank stares!
Posted by Blogger Christi :  November 10, 2007

*laughing out loud over here* well, i would have lauhed too, and maybe even said it before you, lol.

Congrats on Marks promotion!

We must be kindred spirits--I would have laughed and followed it up with something equally scandalous.
Posted by Blogger shauna :  November 11, 2007

I love the idea of a pimped out chair - hey maybe that's a gap in the baby market - pimped put highchairs. They could shake every time you manage to get a spoonful of food actually in the baby's mouth and when they successfully eat their meal without spreading it all thorugh their hair it could play some 'phat' beats.
Posted by Anonymous Anna :  November 12, 2007

I love calling things "pimped out". That's exactly what I would do!
Posted by Blogger M :  November 12, 2007

You have to remember, these women spend most of their time congratulating 3 feet tall people for pooing in a toilet and are not used to grown-up jokes or intellectual stimulation anymore. I bet you that either 1) they have been so busy chasing after gooey babies for so many years that they have completely missed out on shows like "Pimp my Ride" or 2) they got it later when they were giving said gooey babies baths and laughed out loud to themselves.
Posted by Anonymous Kari :  November 12, 2007

Some people don't know how to take a joke. I for one, would have thought it was funny!

Whatever happened to fashioning a playgroup out of like-minded friends who happen to have kids the same age as your own children? I don't get the whole play date with strangers thing. I say that a perquisite for play dates should be a sense of humor and a familiarity with the show Pimp My Ride.
Posted by Anonymous cce :  November 13, 2007

Hi, found your blog via TumbleDry. I would have definitely been laughing at your comment, hope the rest of the playgroup went well....any kindred spirits or is it too soon to tell? Playgroups are hard, good luck I hope you find someone who is cool and easy to talk to.
Posted by Blogger Angela :  November 13, 2007

wow...those moms must have no sense of humour. i would totally have laughed!

congrats to Mark on his promotion! great news!
Posted by Anonymous cate :  November 13, 2007

When I was 12, I received a grey, pin-striped suit for Easter. My aunt, a devout Christan, asked me how I liked my suit.

I replied, "It's awesome! It has pimp-stripes and everything!" I never understood why the blood drained from my aunt's face until years later.

So you're not alone in the awkward pimp reference.

Congrats on your hubby's promotion!
Posted by Blogger The Bizza :  November 14, 2007


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