| Mother's Day |
Today is Mother’s Day. A tradition filled with heartfelt Hallmark moments wrapped in the sweet scent of flowers to love and honour the role of Motherhood.
For me, it’s such a bittersweet day. Although my heart is bursting at the seams with joy as I watch Nathan’s tiny chest rise and fall in a peaceful sleep beside me, it is also filled echo’s of numbness as I remember the child that is no longer with me.
For the longest time after Ava died I felt like the victim of a wretched identity theft. Sure I was still a mom, except there were no sticky fingers to clean or tiny bodies to rock to sleep. I felt like I was part of some sort of invisible mom club filled with shadowy corridors and fake plastic smiles to hide the emptiness.
But this mother’s day I have Nate. My Son. A living, breathing baby. A beacon on the horizon of hope. A promise of a happiness. A bucket filled to the brim with bliss. A new rhythm for the beat of my soul and the calm of the storm of anguish that persistently lingers and follows me wherever I go.
On this Mother’s Day I will try not to cling to the past. I will embrace the sting of my reality, shed a tear for Ava and cherish my baby and the season of joy he brought with him when he entered this world.
Wishing all mother's, expecting mom's and struggling-to-be-mom’s a wonderful day filled with fierce love and hugs a plenty.
Labels: Baby Nate, In Memory of Ava, Motherhood |
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You deserve this day. have a good one.
Enjoy it to the fullest. Smiles and tears too. Love and hugs on this very special Mother's Day.
*Hugs*. Enjoy this day, Karla - it was made for you!
I'm so glad that Nate is here to fill your heart!
Happy Mother's Day sweetie! You deserve it more than anyone I know!
Hugs from Ottawa!
Happy Mother's Day. Your descriptions are so accurate. Your insightfulness is a lifelong Mother's Day gift from Ava.
Thanks for sharing your life with me. I have learned much from you without having ever said a word to date myself.
Happy Mother's Day to you too. I wish you a very very good day.
Karla, Happy Mother's Day! I wish I could give you a big long hug and let you know that you are thought of so very often! I guess this will have to do! Hugs and love from my heart to yours!
karla.........it's soooo nice that you have Nate with u on this mothers day!! I'm sure Ava is watching over you all on this day as well!! :) You more then anyone deserves today........it's nice to say Happy Mothers Day to YOU!!
HAVE A GREAT ONE!! :D:D
Happy Mother's Day. Though I don't know you in person I have read enough to feel like I do. You deserve the happiness of this day.
Happy Mother's Day, Karla.
happy Mother's Day
Right back to you, Karla...Happy Mother's Day.
I have a new baby girl, just about to turn 4 months. I forget how I ended up here, but I did, and I read your Ava posts. They made me cry.
Since I'm a guy, that's totally unmanly, so you'll forgive my using a false name.
Happy Mother's Day. It sounds like you deserve it as much as anybody.
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Happy Mother's Day!
A very Happy Mother's day to a mom who deserves all the happiness in the world.
Belated Mother's Day wishes Karla.
I echo the sentiments of the other posters. I hope your mother's Day was pleasant, and that the pleasure of the present outweighed the sting of your loss.
Sorry to hear about Ava, Happy Mothers Day!
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Anvilcloud : May 13, 2007 
