Barbie
by Karla ° Thursday, April 9, 2009
Every two weeks or so, Mark gets a haircut. And he gets a haircut by a woman he likes to call “Barbie”. When I asked him why he calls this woman “Barbie” he said because she drives a fancy sports car and has nice blond hair. I was all like, oh, Hai! I’m a dishevelled housewife who wears reversible yoga pants for days on end and ties her gray-root infested hair in a perpetual knot. And I also drive a big ass Mini Van that smells like McDodnald’s. Don't forget who cooks your dinner loverboy.

Just to take a step back for a moment, I do have to admit that Mark has had some pretty bad haircuts in the past. His hair has a tendency to stick out and up in all the wrong places so the fact that he’s found someone who can give him a fabulous haircut every other week is great because that means I’m not chasing him out the door with a dollop of gel in my hand trying to smooth down random sticky uppy’s.

Anyway, he gets home from having his hair cut the other day and I asked him how “Barbie” was doing. And Mark was all, “Oh Barbie. Barbie Barbie Barbie!” And his eyes kind of glazed over as he went into his own little dream world and I think he may have said something about her big 80’s inspired blond hair and huge tits, but I don’t remember because I was too busy wiping up his drool off the floor.

Apparently, as I have come to understand, "Barbie" isn’t just some blond with a cute sports car that cuts my husband’s hair. Nope. "Barbie" is a GORGEOUS woman with very large and ample breasts who wears cleavage-enhancing clothing and pungent perfume and, no, seriously, get this, short skirts and fish net stockings.

"Barbie" also has mile-long legs and a tiny waist and, well, looks exactly like a perfectly plastic bombshell version of Barbie. Except with a real vagina. I’m assuming.

My neighbour across the street has his barber visit him at home when he needs a haircut and I’m pretty sure that makes his wife the most brilliant woman on the whole entire planet.

Labels: ,

Permanent link to this entry




Comments:


Lol, that's hilarious Karla...well, to a point I guess, I mean as a housewife I know just what you're talking about...these men...there's always a "Barbie". Hope you're feeling at least a little better by the way, I've had a number of EEG's, ECG's (I had epilepsy as a teen), and yes they do tend to make your hair look like a rat's nest, but they are the best thing, but as for a June date, I don't know what hospital you go to, I go to Rouge Valley Centenary in Scarborough...my doctor works out of there, and they can give appointments for those fast usually!
Anyways I'll keep you in my thoughts, all the best, I'm sure it will be just a small glitch in all that you've already gone through.
Posted by Anonymous Krystle :  April 09, 2009
 

I am still laughing ~ what is it with hairdressers? The salon that I go to has loads of gorgeous woman cutting hair ~ do they get an extreme make over at hair cut school ~ or am I just getting old and andcranky ha ha !!

Sounds like that neighbour of yours has good sense LOL!

Hope that things are going well with you ~ thinking of you and sending much love XXXXXXX
Posted by Blogger Tabitha :  April 09, 2009
 

Hope you are keeping well Karla.

Sounds like Mark might have to start wearing one of Nate's bibs next time he goes to the hairdressers to catch the drool!
Boys are so easily pleased!

Love,
Amanda x
Posted by Blogger Amanda :  April 09, 2009
 

Is it possible that it's an old guy called Tony, and he's yanking your chain?
Posted by Blogger Anvilcloud :  April 09, 2009
 

Barbie is a lot nicer than the nickname I make up.

ALL women who speak to my husband who are single are "Ho's". No, I'm not in therapy. :D
 

This is why I cut my husband's hair. AND, I cut it in that outfit you just described!! Works out beautifully for both of us, no cash exchanges hands (which is a huge bonus in this rotten economy) and the fringe benefits are awesome! :)
Posted by Blogger Tajalude :  April 09, 2009
 

Mark gets his hair cut every two weeks? I guess he doesn't complain about having to that now does he? hehehe
Posted by Blogger Spellbound :  April 09, 2009
 

Perhaps you should go to Barbie and get your roots done and cut your hair into a shape, ditch the reversible yoga pants and stop letting the kids eat McDonalds in the car.

Maybe he's over frazzled Mom as a look.
 

The Girl Revolution: Have you seen Karla? Her look is anything but "over frazzled Mom."
 

The Girl Revolution. I'm with She Like Purple. You need to get the whole story before bashing a mom the day before the anniversary that her daughter died.
Posted by Anonymous Anonymous :  April 13, 2009
 

Oh Karla. I'm so sorry for people can be so cruel. Please know that those of us who "know" you would never leave such a trollish comment.
Posted by Anonymous Susan :  April 13, 2009
 


advertisement




Search Untangling Knots:


Search Results:

Thursday, April 09, 2009




Recently
Monday, April 06, 2009
Sunday, April 05, 2009
Friday, April 03, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009