Lunatic on a Leash
by Karla ° Wednesday, May 31, 2006
My dog Samson has officially grown big enough to overtake me.

Our trainer warned us that puppies can turn into raucously awkward teenage rapscallions when they turn six months of age, but I had no idea my stubborn dog would transform into a bulldozing renegade.

To set the scene.

Seminal Arbitrator (me): 110 lbs of girlish wimp

Bludgeoning beast (Samson): 55 lbs of cavorting canine goofball (with a veterinarian certified best guess of 90 lbs fully grown).

He can literally drag me down the street like a tattered ragamuffin.

Which is my fault. I’ve babied him.

He had an abysmal disklike for his Gentle Leader, and practically clawed his own eyes out to get it off. Being the pushover that I am, I gave in and let him have his way not knowing that in a few months time, it would be him having his way with me.

And so the story goes, my new normal is a lunatic limb dislocating leash lunging mutt who has grown to the perfect height for administer dangerously painful crotch pokes with his herculean head, and smashingly quick table clearing swoops with his hypersonically swift tail.

That, and monstrous pregnancy zits that make me want to hide in my pillowcase for the next seven months.

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Comments:


Oh My Karla....they say that dogs can sense pregnancy hormones....maybe it's his klutzy way of protecting you? LOLOL
I am sure the pregnancy zits are so bad, I bet you are JUST GLOWING!
Posted by Blogger Patyrish :  May 31, 2006
 

We had one of those Gentle Leaders and it was the best. I didn't know about it until my dog was 3 years old, so it's not too late to try again. He hated it, but after a couple days he got used to it and grew to love it because he knew it meant going out. At first I did not attach the leash to his collar also and he was able to wriggle free, so I learned that you have to attach it to both. A lot of people thought it was a muzzle and thought our dog must be viscious.
Posted by Blogger Unknown :  May 31, 2006
 

Just got one of those for our little girl (65lbs). It took her a while too, but she's comfortable with it.
Posted by Blogger methatiam :  May 31, 2006
 

You crack me up. I love your descriptions.

And only because I have a lab/pit puppy [well, he's 2 1/2 now, but he'll always be a puppy in my eyes!] who weighs in just above 100lbs can I completely understand where you're coming from!

And my boy is still soooooo clumsy! That's the lab in 'em both. :]

You've got to love them, honestly!
Posted by Anonymous Anonymous :  May 31, 2006
 

i guess that is why people used a choke leash before they came up with the gentle leader.....there has got to be something inbetween!
Posted by Blogger dawnatello :  May 31, 2006
 

I am sure you look fine. You are a beautiful woman!

Oh Brutus had a gentle leader and he hated it hated it. I never made him wear what a mistake...oh well!
 

Woohoo on the pregnancy.
And the only good dog is a spoiled dog.
Oh, and once again. Woohoo on the pregnancy..
Posted by Anonymous Anonymous :  June 01, 2006
 

Upon further reflection, there is only one infallible way to handle walking a big dog:

1. Get the leash
2. Attach leash
3. yell – “HONEY! COME AND WALK YOUR DOG!”
Posted by Blogger methatiam :  June 02, 2006
 

keep checking back to see how you guys are. very excited about your news!! praying all goes fine. xox
Posted by Blogger gina :  June 02, 2006
 


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